LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIPS (LDR's) CAN THEY WORK?

Before I start typing I know half of you all are saying no!!! Long Distance Relationships can not work!!! 

Well that's your reality and I hope in your ignorance you are still receptive.

So what is a LDR?

A long-distance relationship (LDR) or a "long-distance romantic relationship" (LDRR) is typically an intimate relationship that takes place when the partners are separated by a considerable distance. Partners in LDRs face geographic separation and lack of face-to-face contact. LDRs are particularly prevalent among college students- constituting 25% to 50% of all LDRs. [1] Even though scholars have reported a significant number of LDRRs in undergraduate populations, long-distance relationships continue to be an ‘understudied’ phenomenon.

So if the definition was even necessary can long distance relationships work?

Of course Yes and of course No!

As with anything else there is nothing guaranteed or 100% infallible. I am here however to inform you why they can since the overwhelming majority believe otherwise.

Delayed gratification:

Delayed gratification, or deferred gratification, is the ability to resist the temptation for an immediate reward and wait for a later reward. Generally, delayed gratification is associated with resisting a smaller but more immediate reward in order to receive a larger or more enduring reward later.

Delayed gratification is a key to success in majority of our aspirations. 

For example: in school (University or Otherwise) it is tempting to party every night and ignore work and other scholastic responsibilities however because you value graduating (more enduring reward) more than the club (immediate reward) you stop or at least limit your partying. 

Do you see where I'm going with this?

Another example: You are saving for a major purchase (Car, House, Business). Those new ____ look good though but you know that at the end of the day that purchase just sets you one step back from your true desire!

The great thing is This practice of delayed gratification can also be applied to relationships! 

If your significant other
Is truly worth it of course you can wait. Yes it is tempting and in human nature to be attracted to members of the opposite sex (especially when you are use to having your special someone around) however just as you practice discipline with anything else apply it for love! 

Here are some tips to make things work (if you want it to) compliments of lovingfromadistance.com

1. Watch movies or TV shows simultaneously together!

This activity takes the #1 spot on our list because it is the activity that Frank and I LOVE TO DO THE MOST whenever we are apart. There are various ways of doing this. Most couples like to have contact while watching a movie together and do so over the phone and/or instant messenger and/or on their webcams :) You can each go out and physically rent the same movie and watch it together or you can access a streaming movie online.

2. What are you waiting for??? Get a webcam!

First of all, if you don't already have a webcam, get one! You'll be glad you did. For Frank and I, it was possibly one of the best purchases we ever made for our relationship! There are a bunch of ideas in this list that incorporate the use of video chatting.

3. Read a book together.

 A great idea is to read a book together. This is great for those couples who have limited time together, and need to find something to do together when they can't be. Find a book you think you both would enjoy and agree to read a chapter every night. Reading together, can open up lots of discussion, and can help boost a relationship in which both people feel they have run out of things to talk about. Check out Half.com. They sell books at very discounted prices, new and used. Also, be sure to check out our LDR Book Store for LDR advice books as well as novels based on characters who are in LDR's.

4. Apologize for something stupid you did.

Okay, we all do stupid things once in awhile that hurts our other half from afar. Often they usually require an apology. Sometimes though it can be hard to overcome our pride and say "sorry." And then sometimes saying sorry doesn't cut it, and the hurt party throws it back in your face and tells you that you don't really mean it. We've all been there right? Well when you're at a distance, apologies are even harder, for example, you can't offer a comforting hug to make the other person feel better. And can you really help it if he/she is giving you the cold shoulder and they're not responding to phone calls or email?

The list of acitivities goes on and on and if you are in a Long Distance Relationship definitely check out lovingfromadistance.com. Thanks to technology LDR's have it much easier than times past. This is not to say all relationships should work that's not true at all but if you want them to they can it comes down to Trust, Desire, and Faith.

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- PEACE